[Food Review]
Haché LA
boring food, ‘tude, and ordinary brew in Silverlake:
but hey these are the cool people you’re going to be dining with so don’t complain and wait in line.
Visit time and date: 9:18 p.m., May 22, 2015
by Reviewer Rob
“Is it for you or Alabama?,” asked the black guy behind the grill at Haché LA. His The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air haircut included a hipsteresque beard in an effort to update the look. He was talking to Emily, the blond girl I’d just met in line while waiting to place my order. Emily, I’d found out during the 15 minutes we chatted before getting to the counter, was a movie set prop-master for a feature film being shot in the San Fernando Valley. She was dressed in the casual work site attire of black leather Dr. Martens boots and an OD-green military surplus jacket, the kind with lots of pockets.
Haché LA’s kitchen area is adjacent to the front window facing the street and the entryway, and you can watch the two cook’s faces but not their hands after you enter and wait in line like we were. Emily had asked one of the cooks if the habanero sauce on the Swiss Onion sandwich was any good. The cook snarked back with a witty comment regarding the guy standing next to her, namely me, and asked if it was “for you or Alabama”. Ha ha ha. I was born in Los Angeles near the Pacific Ocean. But has my long hair and living in San Diego for most of my life given me the appearance of being redneck and racist? Maybe to Bearded Will Smith.
The beer I ordered to keep me company while I waited for the Swiss Onion to arrive wasn’t much better than the cook’s vibe. It was a Hop Notch IPA (or “Hop Nosh IPA” as I guess they’re called now according the the all-knowing internet, long story). It tasted overly sweet and fizzy. The sandwich was bland and its meat undercooked, especially for the price. The bun was cold. This dish was mildly redeemed by the sauce a young rich-looking Mexican hair salon owner from the neighborhood who voluntarily asked the cook for me for. He sat at my picnic table with some of his friends, one of whom was sporting a new Apple Watch.
The Haché LA clientele rates a four-and-a-half out of five. But the reataurant gets a two out of five. So I probably won’t go back.